Obiect. Chriſt tooke vp his mother very roundly for reprouing him vniuſtly. to §. 39. Of childrens Recompence.

Obiect. Chriſt tooke vp his mother very roundly for reprouing him vniuſtly.

Anſw. Chriſt as God-man was greater then his mother, and in that reſpect with authoritie blamed her for her vniuſt reproofe. The Virgin Marie was not ignorant thereof, and therefore was ſilent.

§. 32. Of childrens readineſſe to amend what is iuſtly reproued by their parents.

If a childe be iuſtly for his fault reproued by his parents,

both conſcience toward God, and obedience to his parent, requireth that he readily redreſſe that which is amiſſe. Vnleſſe amendment of the thing iuſtly reproued be added to patient bearing of reproofe, that patience can be no better accounted of, then diſſimulation, and plaine mockage. When the father in law of Moſes told him, that what he did was not well, he forthwith amended it.

But contrarily many lewd and vngracious children continue to goe on in their wicked courſes, though their parents againe, and againe rebuke them for it. Iuſt was Elies reproofe of his children, but yet no amendment followed. Now note the inference made thereupon by the holy Ghoſt, They obeyed

not the voice of their father, becauſe the Lord would ſlay them: whereby is implied, that to deſpiſe the iuſt reproofe of parents is an euident ſigne, and forerunner of Gods heauy iudgement. Salomon calls the childe which will heare no rebuke, a Scorner, which noteth out a moſt obſtinate ſinner that cannot be reclaimed, and in that reſpect is ſcorned of the Lord.

§. 33. Of Childrens ſubmiſſion to their parents correction.

IIII. Correction is a reall reproofe, a reproofe in the higheſt degree, euen the ſeuereſt kinde of reproofe: ſo as by ſubiection hereunto great tryall of obedience is made. By the ſame meanes muſt a childes ſubmiſſion to his parent in this kinde of reproofe be manifeſted, as in the former: namely,

1. By bearing patiently the correction which his parent ſhall giue him.

2. By amending readily that for which he is iuſtly corrected.

The former of theſe is noted by the Apoſtle as a ruled caſe, a matter not to be denied, in theſe words, We haue had fathers of our fleſh which corrected vs, and we gaue them reuerence. One ſpeciall part of this reuerence is a patient ſuffering: therefore he inferres thereupon, ought we not to be in ſubiection? &c.

The latter is ſet forth by Salomon vnder an effect which followeth vpon the performance thereof: for hauing aduiſed a parent to correct his childe, he addeth this reaſon, He ſhall giue thee reſt, yea he ſhall giue delight vnto thy ſoule: how can

this reſt, and delight be giuen, but by the childes amendment of that for which he is corrected? A parent taketh no delight in the paine, and ſmart of his childe, but in the fruit that followeth thereupon. As a childes tranſgreſſion is a griefe, and vexation to the parent, ſo his amendment cauſeth reſt and delight. Now this effect followeth not ſimply vpon correction, but vpon the good vſe thereof which is made by the childe. It lyeth therefore in the childe, and ſo lyeth vpon him as a dutie, to giue this reſt and delight to his parent by amending the fault for which he is corrected, as he brought griefe to him by prouoking him to vſe correction. Thus ſhall neither parent repent the inflicting, nor the childe repent the induring of correction.

That a childe may attaine to this degree of obedience, he muſt duly conſider both the Cauſe whereby his parent is moued to correct him, and alſo the End which he aimeth at therein. The cauſe is the loue he beareth to his childe. The end which he aimeth at, is his childes

good. If theſe motiues worke not obedience, what can?

§. 34. Of refuſing, or abuſing correction.

Contrary is diſdaine on the one ſide, and obſtinacie on the other. Diſdaine, when children ſcorne to be corrected by their parents: and in that reſpect when by all the meanes they can vſe, they cannot auoid it, they will mutter and murmure, fret and fume, rage and raue againſt their parents, and deſpiſe and hate them for it. Obſtinacie, when they will be no whit bettered thereby, but ſtill runne on in their leaud courſes, and rather waxe the worſe for being corrected. This may be counted the higheſt pitch of a childes rebellion: for this is the laſt meanes which a parent can vſe to reclaime his childe from deſperate courſes. If this preuaileth not, the law of God requireth, that a parent ſhould giue vp his childe into the hand of the Magiſtrate, that he may be put to death.

Hitherto of the diſtinct branches of childrens Obedience.

The Extent thereof followeth.

§. 35. Of childrens conforming their iudgements to their parents.

The extent of childrens obedience is only implied in this Epiſtle to the Epheſians, but it is expreſſed (Col. 3. 20) in theſe words, Children obey your parents IN ALL THINGS. A large extent, but not ſimply to be taken without any limitation: for the Apoſtle himſelfe noteth a reſtraint in theſe words, In the Lord. So farre forth as children tranſgreſſe not any of Gods commandements in obeying their parents, they ought to obey. This is to obey in all things, in the Lord.

The extent of childrens duties being the very ſame that was of wiues duties: and the reſtraint alſo the ſame, that order which was there obſerued ſhall here alſo be kept. Only other proofes more pertinent to childrens place, ſhall be brought to confirme thoſe generall propoſitions which may be applied to any inferiours. Many generall reaſons there alledged for proofe of the propoſitions ſhall here be omitted. Wherefore compare this place with that.

Thus we ſee that parents authority is very large: there is no reſtraint of it but Gods contrary command, whereof a childe muſt be aſſured, if he refuſe to obey his parent in any thing.

It is not enough for a childe to ſay I haue thus long, and in thus many things obeyed my parent, I hope in ſome things if I haue mine owne will, I may be excuſed. No: All things compriſe more then many things. Wherefore Many are not enough. And though Gods will be exempted, yet is not thine owne will exempted: though thou maieſt doe nothing againſt Gods will, yet thou oughteſt to doe many things againſt thine owne will, if it be contrary to thy parents.

Two things are to be laboured after by children for attaining to this extent of obedience in all things.

1. They muſt labour to bring their iudgement and will to the bent of their parents: to thinke that meet and conuenient for them to doe which their parents will haue them doe. Though Iſaak thought it ſomewhat ſtrange that he ſhould carry wood vp to an hill to offer ſacrifice where was nothing for a burnt offering, yet it being the will of his father that he

ſhould doe ſo, he thought it meet enough for him to doe ſo.

This ſubiection of iudgement and will is to be yeelded in all the particular caſes of obedience which were before propounded, as in their calling, mariage, apparrell, allowance, &c. So as children are to thinke that kinde of calling, that particular match, that apparrell, and that allowance to be meeteſt for them, which their parents thinke meete.

If the iudgement be perſwaded of the meetneſſe of a thing, and the will inwardly brought to yeeld vnto it, outward obedience will more readily and cheerefully bee yeelded thereunto.

Contrary is the ouerweining conceipt which many children haue of their owne iudgement and will, who thinke they can better diſcerne what is fit and meete for themſelues, then their parents. They imagine their parents to be too ſtrict and preciſe, or too ſuſpicious and iealous, or too couetous and worldly. This maketh them take what callings, what matches, what apparrell, what allowance they thinke beſt; whence many miſchiefes ariſe, which would all eaſily be auoided, if they would lay downe that preſumptuous conceit, and labour to obſerue the forenamed direction.

§. 36. Of childrens yeelding to practiſe at their parents command, ſuch things as in their iudgements they cannot thinke very meet.

2. Though children cannot in their iudgements thinke that which their parents require to be the fitteſt and meeteſt, yet being preſſed thereto by the peremptory command of their parents, in practiſe they ought to yeeld vnto it, ſaying to their parents as Peter to the Lord, Neuertheleſſe at thy word I will doe this, Thus did Iaakob yeeld to Rebekah: he thought by doing that which his mother bid him, he ſhould ſeeme a [gap]ocker to his father, yet ſhe vrging him, he did it.

Queſt.

May not a childe, yeelding better reaſon then his parent, refuſe to doe what he thinketh vnmeet, or at leaſt for [gap]eare to doe what he is commanded, till he be better informed [gap]f the meetneſſe thereof?

Anſw. With reuerence and humility he may render his

reaſon why he thinketh it not meete, and deſire his parent not to vrge it vpon him.

(This did Iudah one of the ſonnes of Iaakob, and is not blamed for it:) and parents ought in ſuch a caſe to yeeld to their children (as Iaakob did.) But yet if in things indifferent, parents be otherwiſe minded then their children, and will haue their children yeeld to them, they muſt yeeld.

For, 1. In in different things the command of a parent is a warrant to the childe, by reaſon of this extent (all things:) ſo as the parent may ſinne in commanding that, in doing whereof the childe may not ſinne. Who can cleare Rebeckah of ſinne in commanding Iaakob to deceiue his father? yet I take it, that Iaakob cannot iuſtly be blamed for obeying.

2. Children doe thus manifeſt an high eſteeme of their parents, and very great reſpect towards them: they ſhew how deſirous they are to pleaſe them, and how fearefull to offend them. When the will of parent and childe conſent, there is no ſuch triall.

3. By this meanes peace and loue is better preſerued betwixt parent and childe: a parents anger is ſtopped, the effects thereof auoided, and many other miſchiefes preuented, which oft fall out when inferiours refuſe to yeeld to their ſuperiours who haue authority ouer them.

Contrary is their prepoſterous peremptorines who will doe nothing againſt their own mind & will, though their parents require it neuer ſo much. This phraſe ( If thou wilt not ſend, we will not goe downe) which Iudah vſed to his father, though in a good cauſe, was too peremptory for a childe. They who obſtinately refuſe to doe thoſe things which are againſt their owne minde, muſt needs come ſhort of this extent, Obey in all things. Yea they ſhew that what they doe is rather for their owne ſakes becauſe they like it, then for their parents ſake. What obedience then may that be thought to be? Yet this is all the obedience which many children will yeeld. If they thinke not that which their parents require to be meet, nor faire, nor foule meanes ſhall moue them to doe it; whereby many children doe much prouoke their parents. Let ſuch children know, that it is euery way more ſafe for them at the inſtant

command of their parent to doe that which they conceiue to be vnmeet, then peremptorily to diſobey their parents, which is more then vnmeet, euen vnlawfull.

§. 37. Of the reſtraint of childrens obedience.

The reſtraint of childrens obedience is expreſſed in this clauſe, in the Lord: which phraſe affordeth a neceſſary limitation in obeying their parents, who are but parents of our fleſh, men and women, ſubiect to erre in their commandements, and to require ſuch ſinfull things as their children may not with a good conſcience performe. The limitation then which the forenamed clauſe (in the Lord) affordeth, is this,

Children muſt performe no other obedience to their parents, then may ſtand with their obedience to God. The reaſons rendred by the Apoſtle proue as much: This is right, this is well pleaſing to

the Lord. But to obey parents againſt the Lord is neither right nor wellpleaſing to the Lord.

If therefore parents command their children to doe any thing limitations of childrens obedience. which the Lord hath forbidden them, they ought not to doe it. On this ground did Michal well in ſuffering her husband Dauid to eſcape out of the handes of Saul her father. I iuſtifie not her manner of carying the matter, with vntruths, and falſe tales; but her refuſing to yeeld to her fathers minde and will is iuſtifiable, and that in two reſpects.

1. In that the difference was betwixt her husband and father. Now by Gods law a wife is to yeeld to her husband rather then to her father.

2. Becauſe ſhe knew her father ſought to ſlay him: if then ſhe had deliuered him into the hands of her father, ſhe had made her ſelfe acceſſary to murder. In this latter reſpect Io [gap]athan alſo did well in refuſing to fetch Dauid at his fathers command.

Thus if a father command his childe to goe to Maſſe, to forſweare himſelfe, to marry an Idolater, to ſteale, to lie, or to

commit any other ſinne forbidden by God, the childe ought not to obey: thoſe things cannot be done in the Lord.

Againe if parents forbid their children the doing of any neceſſary duty commanded of God, the childe ought to doe it notwithſtanding the parents inhibition. We may well thinke that Ahaz who ſet himſelfe ſo violently to deface the holy things of God, to prophane his ordinances, and to ſhut vp the doores of Gods Houſe, gaue ſtrait charge to his ſonne that he ſhould not repaire them againe; yet Hezekiah ſo ſoone as he had power did repaire all.

If a parent forbid his childe to goe to the Proteſtants Churches, to heare a Sermon, to pray in a knowne tongue, to giue iuſt weight, and meaſure, to ſpeake the truth when he is called to witneſſe it, with the like; he muſt be of Daniels minde, and notwithſtanding that prohibition, doe the things which God requireth.

§. 38. Of childrens ſinne in yeelding to their parents againſt God.

Contrary to this limitation is on the one ſide a flattering eie-ſeruice in many children, who care not what they doe, be it good or euill, lawfull or vnlawfull, ſo they may pleaſe their parents thereby: and on the other ſide a ſlauiſh fearefulneſſe, which maketh them ſo to dread their parents as they feare not God at all: they will rather chooſe to ſinne and ſo prouoke Gods wrath, then doe any thing whereby their parents wrath may be prouoked. It is a brand ſet vpon euill kings that they walked in the waies of their fathers, and mothers: and did wickedly as they counſelled them. Wherefore the following and obeying of their parents in euill was ſo farre from extenuating their ſinne, as it did rather aggrauate the ſame. The preferring of father and mother before the Lord Chriſt ſheweth that ſuch a childe is not worthy of Chriſt: In compariſon of Chriſt Father and mother muſt be hated. But that vndue and vnchriſtian-like reſpect of parents aboue Chriſt, is it that maketh ſo many young Papiſts, young ſwagerers, ſwearers, liars, deceitfull perſons, and lewd liuers.

For auoiding the two forenamed extremes let thine heart be filled with a true feare of God, and withall conſider the difference

betwixt our earthly parents and our heauenly Father. They are but parents of our fleſh, he is the Father of ſpirits. They can but touch the body, he can caſt body and ſoule into hell. They are but a while ouer vs, he for euer. Their authority is ſubordinate to his, his ſupreme & abſolute of it ſelfe. They can giue but a light temporary reward; he, an eternall weight of glorie. They cannot ſhelter vs from his wrath, he can from theirs.

Hitherto of ſuch duties of children as reſpect their parents authority, ſuch as reſpect their neceſſity follow.

§. 39. Of childrens Recompence.

The generall head whereunto al the duties which children owe to their parents in regard of their Neceſſity, is in one word Recompence, which is a dutie whereby children indeauour as much as in them lieth, to repay what they can for their parents kindneſſe, care, and coſt towards them, and that in way of thankfulneſſe; which maketh a childe thinke he cannot doe too much for his parent, & well may he thinke ſo, for a parent doth much more for his childe before it is able to doe for it ſelfe, then the childe poſſibly can doe for the parent. So as if the parents authority were laid aſide, yet the law of equity requireth this dutie of Recompence: ſo alſo doth the law of piety and charity. Wherefore of all other Duties this is moſt due. It is in expreſſe termes giuen in charge to children by the Apoſtle, who willeth them to learne to requite their parents.

Contrary is neglect of parents in their need, which is more then monſtrous ingratitude. As all ingratitude is odious to God and man, ſo this moſt of all, and yet very many are guilty thereof. In them the prouerbe is verified that loue is weighty. For it is the property of weighty things to fall downe apace, out to aſcend ſlowly, and that not without ſome violence. Thus loue from the parent to the childe falleth downe apace, [gap]ut it hardly aſcendeth from children to parents. In which reſpect another prouerbe ſaith, One father will better nouriſh nine children, then nine children one father. Many children in his kinde doe no more for their parents, then for ſtrangers. They either conſider not how much their parents haue done

for them; or elſe they conceit that what their parents did, was of meere dutie, and needeth no recompence. Fie vpon ſuch barbarous and inhumane children!