§. 35. Of directing parents how to teach their children true pietie. to §. 44. Of parents reprouing their children.

§. 35. Of directing parents how to teach their children true pietie.

1. Whatſoeuer principle of pietie, parents doe teach their children, they muſt be ſure that it be grounded on Gods word: thus much this phraſe (admonition of the Lord) implieth.

Thus ſhall parents be ſure to feed them with good wholeſome ſpirituall food, ſuch as ſhall make to their ſpirituall nouriſhment, and eternall life. In this reſpect principles of religion grounded on Gods word are called ſound, or wholſome, or healthfull words: and that both in regard of their matter and ſubſtance, and alſo in regard of their effect; they cauſe and preſerue good, ſound, ſpirituall health. We know that naturall men haue a care to giue their children ſuch food as is wholſome for their bodie: (for will a father

that is euill, giue his childe a ſtone, or a ſerpent, and not that which is good?) Conſcience muſt moue religious parents, to haue the like care of the ſoules of their children, as nature teacheth all parents to haue of their bodies. If parents be carefull to draw thoſe principles, wherein they inſtruct their children, out of Gods word, they ſhall be ſure not to poyſon their ſoules with any error, hereſie, ſuperſtition, or idolatrie.

2. When children begin to read, let them read the holy Scripture: ſo was Timothie trained vp from a childe (2 Tim. 3. 15.) Thus will children ſucke in religion with learning: for there is a ſecret vertue lurking in the holy Scripture (which is Gods owne

word) more then in any bookes of men: ſo as through Gods bleſſing there may by this meanes be an inward worke of grace in children euen in their young yeeres. Beſides, no bookes are more eaſie then many parts of Scripture; and no hiſtories more admirable and delightfull, then the hiſtories of the Scripture. It is the aduice of an ancient Father, that young children be made acquainted with the words and names of holy Scripture: and that, in ſtead of tales and fables, choice hiſtories of the Bible be made knowne to them: and that they be inſtructed in the Prouerbs of Solomon.

3. Let children be catechiſed conſtantly from day to day: rehearſe them continually vnto thy children, ſaith the Law. That which is daily done, is in Scripture ſaid to be done continually: as the ſacrifice which was daily offered was called a continuall offering. Here let this caueat be noted, that in giuing this ſpirituall food, parents deale with their children, as skilfull nurſes and mothers doe in feeding infants: they will not at once cram more into their mouthes, then their ſtomach is able to digeſt, but they will rather oft feed them with a little: ſo it is not meet, that parents be too tedious; that will but dull a childs vnderſtanding, and breed weariſomneſſe, and make it loath to be againe inſtructed: but precept vpon precept, precept vpon precept, line vpon line, line vpon line,

here a little, and there a little. Thus ſhall they learne with caſe and delight: and this being oft performed, in time a great meaſure of knowledge will be gained thereby. If a veſſell haue a little mouth, we vſe not to fill it by powring whole paile-fuls vpon it, for ſo all may be ſpilt, and it receiue little or nothing: but we let the liquor fall in by little and little, according to the capacitie of the mouth; ſo is nothing loſt, and the veſſell filled the ſooner. Thus are children to be dealt withall.

4. To the ſet times of catechizing children, let other occaſions of teaching them pietie be added: as at table, by reſembling the ſpirituall food of their ſoules, to that corporall food, whereby their bodies are nouriſhed: when they are walking abroad, by ſhewing them the ſtarres, how they remaine ſtedfaſt in their courſe; the trees, how they bring forth fruit in their ſeaſon; how all things are for the vſe and benefit of man, and thereupon make ſpirituall vſes: note the direction which for this purpoſe the Law giueth to parents, Thou ſhall talke to thy children of my words,

when thou ſitteſt in thine houſe, and when thou walkeſt by the way, and when thou lieſt downe, and when thou riſeſt vp.

5. Let parents open to their children the myſteries of thoſe outward rites which God hath ordained in his Church, as of Preaching, Baptiſing children, adminiſtring the Lords Supper, ceaſing from worke on the Lords day, with the like. This was expreſly commanded vnder the law. Viſible rites are great helpes to the weake vnderſtanding of children, when they are plainly opened and applied: yea they are alſo eſpeciall meanes of keeping in memory the myſteries contained vnder them: as courſe threds or wiars are meanes to preſerue pearles put vpon them. So oft as they ſee the rites they will be put in minde of the myſteries implied vnder them.

6. To this may be referred a declaration of ſuch great and admirable workes as God in former times hath done for his Church: eſpecially ſuch workes as haue beene done in their time: and if any memorials be remaining of them, make them knowne to children. This direction was alſo giuen vnder the law, concerning the monuments which were ſet vp of the great deliuerances that God gaue to his people. In particular when the day of the gunpowder-treaſon is ſolemnized, parents ought to teach their children the occaſion of ſolemni [gap]ing that day. And as God doth any great workes of mercy [gap]r of iudgement, point them out to children. When there is great famine, plague, or any mortality, inſtruct children in [gap]he cauſes thereof: when victory, plenty, peace, or the like, [gap]ach children from whence theſe come. Outward ſenſible things doe beſt worke vpon children.

7. Let religious ſchoole maſters be choſen for children: ſo [gap]ewiſe other maſters to whom children are put forth: and religious houſes where they are placed. Hannah commended [gap]er firſt borne childe to old Eli, a good, religious high Prieſt. [gap] [gap] [gap] maſters themſelues be religious, there is good hope that they will inſtruct in piety ſuch as are vnder them: which if they [gap]oe, what an helpe will that be to parents? If both parents and maſters ioyne therein, it muſt needs be very profitable to [gap]e children. If parents ſhould faile, yet might maſters make a [gap]ood ſupply.

8. Let parents be to their children a good patterne and example in pietie. I and my houſe (ſaith Ioſua) will ſerue the Lord: he ſetteth himſelfe firſt as a guide to the reſt. I will walke in mine houſe with a perfect heart, ſaith Dauid, whereby he would make himſelfe an example, as to others of his family, ſo to his children. Example is a reall inſtruction, and addeth a ſharpe edge to admonition. Much more ſhall a religious parent doe by practiſe then by precept. For children are much inclined to follow their parents: let them goe before, children will ſoone follow after. Practiſe is an euident proofe of the neceſſitie of the precept deliuered.

§. 36. Of Parents faults contrary to their dutie of teaching their children piety.

Many are the aberrations contrary to the forenamed care of teaching pietie. For

1. Moſt parents care only for the temporall and ciuill good of their children: ſo their children may be well fed and clothed, and brought vp in ſome profitable calling, whereby they may well maintaine themſelues in this world, little thought is had, or care taken for their ſpirituall life in this world, or eternall life in the world to come. Wherein are theſe parents better then heathen? Iob was otherwiſe minded: he was more carefull for their ſoules then for their bodies.

2. Many are ſo farre from teaching piety, as they teach their children profaneneſſe, pride, riot, lying, deceit, and ſuch like principles of the deuill. It had beene better for ſuch children to haue liued among wilde beaſts, then vnder ſuch parents. As the children hereby are thruſt headlong to hell, ſo their blood ſhall be required of their parents.

3. Others thinke it enough that their children be taught a religion, but what religion it skilleth not. Such are they as hauing rich kindred but popiſh, commend their children to the education of ſuch kindred, in hope of ſome temporall benefit, that their children may reape from them. If they were as careleſſe of their childrens bodies, they would be accounted little better then murtherers: and is not the ſoule more pretious then the body?

4. So farre are many from catechiſing their children and that daily, as they teach them not ſo much as the Lords praier, the Beleefe, and the ten Commandements. Wherein Papiſts ſhall riſe vp in iudgement againſt them, that are very diligent in teaching their children, Pater noſter, Aue Maria, and ſuch like Latine principles, as the children cannot poſſibly vnderſtand.

5. Few vſe the forenamed outward helpes, as the holy rites appointed of God, the great and glorious workes of God, his extraordinary workes of mercy or iudgement, to inſtruct their children thereby. As they themſelues care not to take notice of any ſuch thing, ſo they care not whether their children doe it or no.

6. So much doe ſome preferre a little pelfe before the true good of their children, as they care not to what ſchoolemaſter they put their children, be he profane, or popiſh, or vnlearned, eſpecially if he be a kinſman, or one of their friends. Few will ſo doe in caſe of their health or outward eſtate: but will rather get the beſt Phyſitian, or the beſt Lawyer that they can. Children oft learne ſuch euill qualities of their ſchoolemaſters as they can neuer ſhake off againe.

7. Many proue very bad patternes to their children, and giue very ill example by profanenſſe, riotouſneſſe, ſwearing, drinking, playing at vnlawfull games, &c. Theſe parents as they brought forth their children in ſinne, ſo they lead them on forward to hell. Their euill example is not only an hinderance to the good inſtruction of others, but alſo maketh all their owne counſells (if at any time they doe giue any good counſell) to be in vaine: for the left hand of euill example ſoone pulleth downe more then the right hand of inſtruction can build againe.

To conclude, thoſe parents whoſe children are not brought vp in the inſtruction of the Lord, ſhew plainly that they regard neither the ſaluation or damnation of their ſoules.

§. 37. Of inſtructing children ſo ſoone as they are capable.

Hitherto of the Kindes of nurture. The Time thereof followeth.

In handling the time of good nurture, I wil ſhew 1. When it ought to be begun.

2. How long it ought to be continued

1. Parents ought to begin to nurture their children ſo ſoone as they are capable of any inſtruction. Euen as young birds are taught by their dammes to flie ſo ſoone as their wings can carry them. Traine vp a childe (ſaith Solomon) that is, while he is young and tender: and againe, He that loueth his childe nurtureth him be times. Thus was Samuel ſent when he was very young to be trained vp vnder Eli, (1 Sam. 1. 24.) and Solomon was inſtructed by his father when he was tender, (Pro. 4. 3.) and Timothy was taught the Scriptures from a young childe, or infant.

There are both priuatiue, and poſitiue reaſons to preſſe this point. Priuatiue, in regard of the miſchiefes that may be preuented thereby. Poſitiue, in regard of the good that may be gained thereby.

1. Many are the euils which children by nature are prone vnto, euen as ranke ground is ſubiect to bring forth many weeds: for the imagination of mans heart is euill from his youth: and fooliſhneſſe is bound in the heart of a childe. If therefore they be not well nurtured betimes, what can be looked for, but the fruits of euill, and folly. But timely nurture will preuent ſuch fruits, and be an excellent preſeruatiue againſt their owne naturall corruption, againſt Satans temptations and againſt the allurements or diſcouragements of the world

2. Continuance in euill maketh children obſtinate, and inflexible therein. Elies ſonnes being ſuffered to goe on in wickedneſſe till they came to ripeneſſe of yeeres, would not afterwards harken to the voice of their Father. What creature can be tamed, if it be not begun with while it is young?

3. When children firſt begin to be capable of inſtruction they are moſt pliable to follow the direction of their parents as is euident by the ordinary courſe of nature in all things Clay, wax, and ſuch other things while they are ſoft receiue any impreſſion: twigs while they are tender are bowed any way: birds and beaſts are eaſily tamed when they are young: corne ſowne betimes bringeth a timely and plentifull harueſt.

4. That which in childhood is learned, is longeſt retained: Traine vp a childe in the way he ſhould goe, and when he is old he will not depart from it. A veſſell longeſt keepeth that ſauour with which at firſt it is ſeaſoned: and by experience we may note old men beſt to remember the things which in their childhood they learned: yea by well educating children from their infancy much labour may afterwards be ſpared: for conſtant vſe of vertue bringeth it vnto a law.

Obiect. To teach children while they are young, is but as to teach a Parrot or ſuch like vnreaſonable creatures: they may learne what is taught them, but they cannot conceiue it.

1. Anſw. Though children haue not ſo deepe an apprehenſion while they are young, as they haue when they come to riper yeares, yet ſo ſoone as they are capable of inſtruction, they doe much better conceiue what is taught them, then vnreaſonable creatures can doe.

2. Though that were granted, yet it would not thereupon follow, that it is better not to be taught while they are young. For, firſt it is better that they ſhould be framed and ſquared to a good courſe, before they can diſcerne betwixt good and euill, [gap]hen be ſuffered to runne on in euill, till they get an habit [gap]herein; which after it is got, will hardly be caſt off. Secondly, by teaching them before they can well conceiue, their apprehenſion is much helped. What may be the reaſon that [gap]hildren of kings, and great men are commonly of more vnderſtanding at 12. or 14. yeares of age, then poore and meane [gap]ens children at 17. or 18. but that they are ſooner, and beter inſtructed? Thirdly, as by age their vnderſtanding commeth to more and more ripeneſſe, they will more and more [gap]nceiue that which at firſt they did not ſo well vnderſtand. Then ſchollers firſt learne their Latine rules, they learne them [gap]eerely by rote, without vnderſtanding the meaning of them, [gap]t afterwards come to make very good vſe of them. Where [gap] children are to be inſtructed betimes euen for the benefit at may be after reaped, as corne is ſowne in winter to receiue [gap]op the harueſt following: and to preuent the miſchiefes at may fall out, leſt they get head ouer their parents againſt [gap]ir minde.

§. 38. Of mothers peculiar care in nurturing young children.

By the way let mothers eſpecially note this point of timely nurture, as a point in peculiar appertaining to them. The grandmother Lois, and mother Eunice, firſt taught Timothy,

Bathſheba taught Salomon when he was young. Oft doth Salomon warne children not to forſake their mothers teaching.

Whereby he implieth that mothers ſhould teach their children eſpecially while they are young: which duty ſo belongeth to a mother, as Salomon laieth the blame, and ſhame of the neglect thereof vpon her: on the other ſide the honour of well nurturing children redoundeth eſpecially to the mother. To this purpoſe is it, that the particular names of the mothers of the kings are recorded in Scripture: intimating thereby that mothers were a maine cauſe of the piety, or impiety of ſuch children. Salomon and Abſolom had both one father, but diuers mothers. May we not well thinke that Salomons mothers care to inſtruct him was an eſpeciall meanes of his piety: and that Abſoloms mothers neglect of this duty, was ſome cauſe of his impiety? It is expreſly noted of Ahaziahs mother, that ſhe was his counſeller to doe wickedly, which made him ſo wicked as he was. Home-experience confirmeth as much: for if father and mother be of diuers religions, moſt of the children will follow the mother. For while children are young, their mother is moſt in their ſight: ſhe feedeth, ſhe apparelleth them, ſhe tendeth them when they are not well, (when the Shunemites childe being ill, ſaid to his father, my head, my head, he ſaid to his ſeruant, carrie him to his mother.) Her precepts therefore and practiſe in that reſpect are beſt heeded by the children, and ſhe hath the beſt opportunity to perſwade them to what ſhe liketh beſt: ſo as what they learne in their younger yeares, commonly they learne of their mothers: and that which then they learne, for the moſt part ſticketh moſt cloſe vnto them, and is longeſt retained by them, as was noted before.

I haue not thus in particular preſſed this point vpon mothers, as if I exempted fathers from all care of nurturing their children in the beginning: for in my text the Apoſtle named Fathers: and Salomon ſaith, that his father taught him eue[gap] while he was tender: and Dauid felt the ſmart of neglecting hi[gap]

other children. It is therefore (as hath before beene proued) a ioynt duty belonging to both. Fathers therefore muſt doe their beſt endeuour, and ſee that mothers doe theirs alſo, becauſe he is a gouernour ouer child, mother, and all.

§. 39. Of letting ſlip the beſt time for nurture.

Contrary is the negligence of moſt parents, who let the beſt yeares wherein their children are moſt docible paſſe ouer in wantonneſſe, vanity, and folly: and ſo loſe that which can neuer be recouered againe, moſt precious time. Hence is it that when they goe about to reclaime their children, they finde them exceedingly peruerſe and head-ſtrong: much like to a ſtrong bigge arme of a tree, which if a man goe about to ſtraiten, he cannot eaſily make it bow: and though it bow, yet will it not continue to ſtand as he would haue it: nay it may be that it will rather breake then bow much. Such a branch was Adoniah. It is apparent that in his childhood he was not well nurtured, for his father would not diſpleaſe him from his childhood.

The fathers putting off this duty to the mother, and the mothers putting it off to the father, is a great cauſe of the neglect thereof. Were both of them perſwaded that it belonged to them both, and in that reſpect would to their power be helpfull each to other, children would much better be inſtructed.

§. 40. Of parents continuing to nurture their children.

As parents muſt begin betimes to nurture their children, ſo they muſt hold on therein, as long as they retaine any gouernment ouer them: yea ſo long as they remaine to be parents vnto them. Some difference there may be in the manner of performing this duty: for children are to be vſed as children: and they who are growne in yeares, and of riper vnderſtanding, accordingly to be dealt withall: yet ſtill muſt parents haue a care of their well doing. The word vſed in my text and tranſlated Children, is a generall word which in Scripture and other writers is vſed to ſet forth all ſort of children, of what ſexe, of what age, of what degree ſoeuer they be. In handling the duty of children we ſhewed, that children owed a ſubiection to parents ſo long as they liued together: wherefore by the rule of relation, ſo long alſo an authority remaineth in parents ouer

their children, and accordingly they ought to haue a fatherly care for their good. On this ground Eli did well in admoniſhing his children after they were maried: his fault was that he went not farre enough in doing his duty: ſomewhat he did, but not all that he ſhould and might haue done. Iob is commended for the care he had ouer his children when they were growne in yeares: for day by day he ſent for them and ſanctified them: and that after they had ſeuerall houſes of their owne, and dwelt apart: and this all their daies.

For the performance of that which is now vrged, parents muſt ſo carrie themſelues from time to time towards their children, as they euer keepe the reines in their owne hands, and retaine a power to curbe their children as they ſee occaſion. They may, as their children grow vp in yeares, ſlaken the reines more and more, but neuer let them cleane goe, and caſt them looſe on their childrens necke.

§. 41. Of parents folly in letting goe all their power ouer their children.

Contrary is their folly who put themſelues in their childrens power, and let goe all their authority ouer them. Many parents that haue thus done, hauing by wofull experience found the miſchiefe and inconuenience that hath followed thereupon, haue much repented their folly, and vſed meanes of redreſſe, but all too late. For a miſchiefe is much more eaſily preuented then redreſſed. All the power that Dauid had could not hold in Abſolom after he was permitted to haue horſes, and chariots, and men at his command. If Dauid, as he begun, had continued to keepe him within a compaſſe, and ſtill held him vnder, all the treaſonable plots which he put in execution, might eaſily haue beene preuented. Our times afford too many examples of parents folly in this kinde, and of the miſchiefes following thereupon.

Of Time of nurture thus farre. The meanes thereof follow.

§. 42. Of adding admonition to inſtruction.

The meanes of helping forward the good worke of nurture are eſpecially two.

• 1. Frequent admonition.

• 2. Due correction.

Both of them are implied in this text: one in the word tranſlated admonition, which (according to the notation of the Greeke word) is a putting of a thing into the mind, an vrging and preſſing of it: the other in the word tranſlated nurture.

Now both theſe are to be ioyned together, as being very helpfull each to other. For admonition without correction is like to proue but meere vanity: and correction without admonition will be too much auſterity.

The dutie which the firſt of theſe ſetteth forth, is this,

Parents muſt oft whet inſtruction vpon their children: they may not thinke it enough to tell their children what they ought to doe, but to inſtruction they muſt adde admonition: and, as it were, beat into their childrens heads the leſſons which they teach them: that ſo they may make a deeper impreſſion in their hearts. Thus ſhall their inſtructions be like the words of the wiſe which are as nailes faſtened, or faſt knocked in: they remain firme where they are once faſtened, and cannot eaſily be pluckt out: for as many blowes doe knocke a naile vp to the head (as we ſpeake) ſo many admonitions doe ſettle good inſtructions in a childes heart, and cauſe that the heart be eſtabliſhed in that which is taught, which is a thing to be laboured after. The generall exhortation of being inſtant in ſeaſon and out of ſeaſon may be applied to this purpoſe: but more pertinently that direction which is in particular giuen to parents of whetting Gods words vpon their children.

To this purpoſe is it that Solomon vſeth to double his inſtructions, and vrge them againe and againe, as heare the inſtruction, forſake not the law:

receiue my words, hide my commandements within thee: incline thine eares, apply thy heart, &c. yea of the repeateth the very ſame precepts.

The apprehenſion of children is fickle, and their memory weake: if they be but once, or ſeldome, or ſleightly inſtructed, that which is taught will ſoone ſlip away, and doe little or no good.

For the better performing of this dutie, parents muſt thinke of the beſt meanes they can to faſten their inſtructions vpon their children: and obſerue their inclination and diſpoſition, and ſee with what they are moſt moued. Conſtant exhortations,

and powerfull perſwaſions are compriſed vnder admonition, which in their kindes, as occaſion requireth, are to be vſed.

§. 43. Of parents weariſomneſſe in inſtructing their children.

Contrary is the practiſe of thoſe parents who ſoone waxe weary in inſtructing their children. The Apoſtle laieth it downe as a generall caueat in good duties that we wax not

weary: if in no good thing we muſt wax weary, ſhall parents wax weary in doing good to their children? Yet how many be there that hauing once taught their children, thinke they haue done dutie enough in that kinde: if their children will take it, they may. They are loth to take too much paines in often vrging the points which they haue taught them.

Thus that teaching vaniſheth away: and ſo it falleth out, as we ſay in the prouerbe, as good not at all as neuer the better. This is one point wherein old Eli failed: for he gaue very good inſtruction to his children: but becauſe he there ſtaied, neither was that accepted of God as a ſufficient diſcharge of his duty, nor were his children any whit bettered thereby. If this were a fault in him notwithſtanding his children were come to yeares of diſcretion, and to ripeneſſe of vnderſtanding, how much greater is the fault in thoſe whoſe children are but young?

Obiect. If a childe take not inſtruction at firſt, he is but of an vntoward and peruerſe diſpoſition: all the paines that can be taken will be loſt.

Anſw. It may be childiſhneſſe rather then peruerſneſſe, or ſome imperfection, rather then obſtinacy. Conſidering the neceſſity of good nurture, no paines may be thought too much. There is more peruerſeneſſe, and vntowardneſſe i[gap] ſuch parents as wax weary in doing this dutie, then in ſuch children as at firſt are not wrought vpon: for this is a means ordained of God to cure this vntowardneſſe.

§. 44. Of parents reprouing their children.

The other meanes of helping nurture is correction.

Which is of two ſorts; Verball, by Words.

Reall,

Blowes.

The former is reprehenſion: and it muſt alwaies goe before

the latter, which is moſt vſually and properly called Correction.

Reprehenſion is a kinde of middle thing betwixt admonition and correction: it is a ſharpe admonition, but a milde correction.

It is the rather to be vſed becauſe it may be a meanes to preuent ſtrokes and blowes, eſpecially in ingenuous, and good natured children (for a reproofe entereth more into him that is wiſe, then a hundred ſtripes into a foole) and becauſe it may be vſed, when it is not ſo meet to vſe ſtrokes and blowes: as when children are growne to man-age.

The many good fruits which the holy Ghoſt noteth to proceed from due reproofe doe ſhew that it is a dutie whereof parents ought to make conſcience as they deſire to promote the good of their children: and ſo much the rather becauſe many good fruits redound to the parents that reproue, as well as to the children reproued. In regard of their good who are reproued, it is ſaid, Reproofes for inſtruction are the way of life: they cauſe vnderſtanding; and make prudent. In regard of their good who reproue, it is ſaid, To them that rebuke ſhall be delight (that is, much comfort and matter of reioycing, ſo as they ſhall not need to repent what they haue done) and a bleſſing of good ſhall come vpon them, that is, either a bleſſing of good men, who will bleſſe, praiſe and commend them: or a bleſſing of good things, and that from the Lord who will reward them for this conſcionable performance of their dutie.

Vpon theſe grounds holy men haue not ſpared to rebuke their children as there was occaſion. Though Eli did ſomewhat in this duty, yet becauſe he was not more ſeuere therein, [gap]he brought deſtruction both vpon himſelfe and his children.

The direction noted §. 40. and 47. and Treat. 4. §. 35. may be here applied.