§. 43. Of vices contrary to mutuall helpe in hoſpitality. to §. 6. Of wiues denying honour to their owne husbands.

§. 43. Of vices contrary to mutuall helpe in hoſpitality.

Contrary to this dutie is for the moſt part couetouſneſſe in the husband, and laſineſſe in the wife. The man, becauſe the charge of the family lieth on him, diſtruſtfully feareth leſt he ſhould want for his owne.

I denie not but that a prouident care for our owne, & namely for them of the family, is needfull and commendable, he that prouideth not for them is worſe then an infidell: ſo as a man may be ouerlauiſh in giuing entertainment, if he goe beyond his meanes, impoueriſh his eſtate, and diſable himſelfe to prouide for his owne, as many doe: yet when a man hath ſufficient, yea and abundance, when there is no iuſt cauſe, but meerely vpon an vndue feare too carkingly, and diſtruſtfully to pinch, and grudge to giue entertaiment to any, is vnbeſeeming a Chriſtian, yea alſo to be worſe then an infidell; not worthy to haue an houſe, or any thing fit for entertainment; no nor worthy of common ſociety.

The woman on the other ſide grudgeth at the paines ſhe muſt take, and trouble ſhe muſt vndergoe about entertaining gueſts, and thereupon is loth that any at any time ſhould come to their houſe.

Concerning a wife, I denie not but that an husband may be in this kinde ouerburdenſome to her, by being too ioueall, as they ſpeake, and bringing gueſts too often into the houſe, eſpecially if they be gueſts of no good name; and by that meanes make her euen weary of her life: but yet for a wife to refuſe all paines in that kinde, and to be diſcontented when her husband inuites any friends, or when any come (as the three Angels did to Abraham) vnawares, argueth not a louing affection, nor a wiuelike ſubiection vnto her husband, to be in her.

Theſe faults are ſo much the greater when the husband, or wife, are free and forward in entertaining their owne kindred

and friends: but are backward, and grudge at the entertainment of each others friends and kindred. Hence commonly ariſeth much heart-burning of one againſt the other: yea much iarre and contention betwixt them: and from diſlike of the practiſe of one another in this kinde oft followeth a diſlike of one anothers perſon: ſo that as the fault is bad in it ſelfe, it proues to be much worſe in the miſchiefes that follow vpon it.

§. 44. Of husbands and wiues mutuall helpe in releeuing the poore.

The laſt common and ioynt dutie wherein husband and wife ought to be helpfull each to other, reſpecteth thoſe that are without the houſe, namely the poore, and ſuch as ſtand in need of their helpe, who are to be releeued and ſuccoured. Becauſe man and wife vſually meale together, and are ioynt partakers of Gods good creatures, they muſt put one another in minde of that precept of charity which was giuen to the Iewes when they were at their meales, ſend part vnto them for whom none is prouided. The good wife which is ſet forth by the holy Ghoſt for a patterne and example vnto others to follow, together with her husband, are noted to be helpfull one to another in this dutie: for ſhe is ſaid to ſtretch out her hand to the poore, and to the needy: and he is ſaid to praiſe her, thereby incouraging her to hold on in doing thoſe good things which ſhe did. What liberty the wife hath, or howfar forth ſhe may be reſtrained in caſe her husband vtterly refuſe to giue conſent, we ſhall hereafter declare in the particular duties of wiues: the point here noted is, that both the huſband himſelfe muſt according to his abilitie be bountifull to the poore, and ſuffer his wife, yea prouoke her ſo to be, and withall allow her wherewithall to be bountifull: and that the wife alſo muſt ſtirre vp her husband to liberalitie in this reſpect, and her ſelfe open her hand to the poore in the things which lawfully ſhe may giue.

There is nothing wherby a man or wife can bring more profit to the houſe, then by giuing to the poore: that which is giuen

to the poore is lent to the Lord, and he will repay it with great increaſe: it is as ſeed, which being liberally ſowen, will bring forth a plentifull harueſt: yea, it is a meanes to make vs friends, to ſpeake a good word for vs at the barre of Chriſts iudgement ſeat: and it bringeth not only the bleſſing of men, but of God alſo, euen the greateſt bleſsing of all, the bleſsing of eternall life: for it is a ſacrifice with which God is well pleaſed. The Apoſtle noteth this to be one of Chriſts oracles, which by word of mouth he left vnto his Diſciples, It is more bleſſed to giue then to receiue.

Beſides, husbands and wiues in diſtributing almes, may receiue good direction one from another: the husband by telling the wife who are fit to be releeued (for commonly huſbands better know thoſe which are abroad out of the family) the wife by telling the husband what things are fitteſt to be giuen away: for wiues commonly know of what things there is greateſt ſtore, and what may in the houſe be beſt ſpared.

§. 45. Of husbands and wiues vnmercifulneſſe to the poore.

Contrarie is the vnmercifulneſſe of many husbands, who are not only hard-hearted themſelues (neuer giuing any thing vnleſſe by the law of the land they be forced, & then they part with that which is giuen, ſo grudgingly, as it is nothing at all acceptable to God (for God loueth a cheerfull giuer) but alſo tie their wiues hands, and ſuffer them to giue nothing. Wherein they bring both the cry of the poore, and alſo the groanes and griefe of a mercifull wife who is thus reſtrained, vpon their owne necks, and aggrauate their ſinne in an high degree.

On the other ſide, the vnmercifulneſſe of many wiues is alſo contrarie to the forenamed dutie: for there are many, who though they haue libertie to giue of the common goods, and alſo allowance of their owne out of which they may giue, yet couetouſly hoord vp all they can get, giue not a pennies worth, out rather ſuffer victuals and other things to periſh in the houſe, and when they are naught to fling them away, then that any thing whilſt it is good ſhould be giuen out of the houſe. Shall not the creatures which are ſpoiled in an houſe,

and the poore that haue wanted, make a loud crie in the eares of the Lord againſt them? Yea further, many wiues are grieued at their husbands bountie, and ſtill mouing him to ſhut his hand, and giue no more. Are they not plaine deuils herein, oppoſing againſt that which is good?

§. 1. Of the generall heads of this treatiſe.

EPHES. 5. 22. Wiues ſubmit your ſelues vnto your owne husbands as vnto the Lord. Verſ. 23. For the husband is the head of the wife, euen as Chriſt is the head of the Church: and he is the Sauiour of the bodie.

Verſ. 24. Therefore as the Church is ſubject to Chriſt, ſo let wiues be ſubiect to their husbands in euerie thing.

IN the particular declaration of wiues duties, the Apoſtle noteth two points,

• 1. The dutie required.

• 2. The reaſon to enforce it.

In ſetting forth the dutie, he declareth

• 1. The matter wherin it conſiſteth.

• 2. The manner how it is to be performed.

In the matter we may note,

• 1. The thing required,
• ſubiection.

• 2. The perſon whom it reſpecteth, their
• owne husbands.

The manner reſpecteth, 1. The qualitie

of that ſubiection.

2. The extent

To declare the qualitie of wiues ſubiection to their huſbands, two rules are ſet downe.

1. That it be ſuch a ſubiection, as ſhould be performed to Chriſt.

2. That it be ſuch a ſubiection as the Church performeth vnto Chriſt.

The extent of wiues ſubiection doth ſtretch it ſelfe verie farre, euen to all things.

The reaſon to enforce all theſe points is taken from that place of eminencie and authoritie, wherein the husband is ſet aboue his wife: which is,

1. Propounded vnder the metaphor of an head (for the huſband is the head of the wife.)

2. Amplified by that reſemblance which therein he hath vnto Chriſt.

In which reſemblance two points are noted.

1. That the husband, by vertue of his place, carrieth the verie image of Chriſt (euen as Chriſt is the head of the Church.)

2. That the husband by vertue of his office is a protector of his wife (and he is the ſauiour of the body.)

§. 2. Of a wiues

ſubiection in generall.

The firſt point to be handled in the treatiſe of wiues particular duties is the generall matter of all (Subiection) vnder which all other particulars are compriſed, for it hath as large an extent as that Honour which is required in the firſt commandement, being applied to wiues. When firſt the Lord declared vnto woman her dutie, he ſet it downe vnder this phraſe, Thy deſire ſhall be ſubiect to thine husband, Gen. 3. 16.

Obiect. That was a puniſhment inflicted on her for her tranſgreſſion?

Anſw. And a law too, for triall of her obedience, which if it be not obſerued, her nature will be more depraued, and her fault more increaſed. Beſides, we cannot but thinke that the woman was made before the fall, that the man might rule ouer her. Vpon this ground the Prophets and Apoſtles haue oft vrged the ſame. Sarah is commended for this, that ſhe was ſubiect to her husband (1. Pet. 3. 6.) Hereby the holy Ghoſt would teach wiues, that Subiection ought to be as ſalt to ſeaſon

euery dutie which they performe to their husband. Their very opinion, affection, ſpeech, action, and all that concerneth the husband, muſt ſauour of ſubiection. Contrary is the diſpoſition of many wiues, whom ambition hath tainted and corrupted within and without: they cannot endure to heare of ſubiection: they imagine that they are made ſlaues thereby. But I hope partly by that which hath beene before deliuered concerning thoſe common duties which man and wife doe mutually owe each to other, and partly by the particulars which vnder this generall are compriſed, but moſt eſpecially by the duties which the husband in particular oweth to his wife, it will euidently appeare, that this ſubiection is no ſeruitude. But were it more then it is, ſeeing God requireth ſubiection of a wife to her husband, the wife is bound to yeeld it. And good reaſon it is that ſhe who firſt drew man into ſin, ſhould be now ſubiect to him, leſt by the like womaniſh weakneſſe ſhe fall againe.

§. 3. Of an husbands

ſuperioritie ouer a wife, to be acknowledged by a wife.

The ſubiection which is required of a wife to her husband implieth two things.

• 1. That ſhe acknowledge her husband to be her ſuperiour.

• 2. That ſhe reſpect him as her ſuperiour.

That acknowledgement of the husbands ſuperioritie is twofold, 1. Generall of any husband.

2. Particular of her owne husband.

The generall is the ground of the particular: for till a wife be informed that an husband, by vertue of his place, is his wiues ſuperiour, ſhe will not be perſwaded that her owne huſband is aboue her, or hath any authoritie ouer her.

Firſt therefore concerning the generall, I will lay downe ſome euident and vndeniable proofes, to ſhew that an husband is his wiues ſuperiour, and hath authoritie ouer her. The proofes are theſe following.

1. God of whom, the powers that be ordained, are, hath power to place his Image in whom he will, and to whom God giueth ſuperioritie and authority, the ſame ought to be acknowledged

to be due vnto them. But God ſaid of the man to the woman, he ſhall rule ouer thee, (Gen. 3. 16.)

2. Nature hath placed an eminencie in the male ouer the female: ſo as where they are linked together in one yoake, it is giuen by nature that he should gouerne, ſhe obey. This did the heathen by light of nature obſerue.

3. The titles and names, whereby an husband is ſet forth, doe implie a ſuperiority and authority in him, as Lord, (1 Pet. 3. 6.) Maſter, (Eſt. 1. 17.) Guide, (Prou. 2. 17.) Head, (1 Cor. 11. 3.) Image and glory of God, (1 Cor. 11. 7.)

4. The perſons whom the husband by vertue of his place, and whom the wife by vertue of her place, repreſent, moſt euidently proue as much: for an husband repreſenteth Christ, and a wife, the Church, (Eph. 5. 23.)

5. The circumſtances noted by the holy Ghoſt at the womans creation implie no leſſe, as that ſhe was created after man, for mans good, and out of mans ſide, (Gen. 2. 18, &c.)

6. The very attire which nature and cuſtome of all times and places haue taught women to put on, confirmeth the ſame: as long haire, vailes, and other couerings ouer the head: this and the former argument doth the Apoſtle himſelfe vſe to this very purpoſe, 1 Cor. 11. 7, &c.

The point then being ſo cleere, wiues ought in conſcience to acknowledge as much: namely that an husband hath ſuperiority and authoritie ouer a wife. The acknowledgement hereof is a maine and principall dutie, and a ground of all other duties. Till a wife be fully inſtructed therein and truly perſwaded thereof, no dutie can be performed by her as it ought: for ſubiection hath relation to ſuperioritie and authoritie. The very notation of the word implieth as much. How then can ſubiection be yeelded, if husbands be not acknowledged ſuperiors? It may be forced, as one King conquered in battell by another, may be compelled to yeeld homage to the conqueror, but yet becauſe he ſtill thinketh with himſelfe, that he is no whit inferiour, he will hardly be brought willingly to yeeld a ſubiects dutie to him, but rather expect a time when he may free himſelfe and take reuenge of the conqueror.

§. 4. Of a fond conceit, that husband and wife are equall.

Contrary to the forenamed ſubiection is the opinion of many wiues, who thinke themſelues euery way as good as their husbands, and no way inferiour to them.

The reaſon whereof ſeemeth to be that ſmall inequalitie which is betwixt the husband and the wife: for of all degrees wherein there is any difference betwixt perſon and perſon, there is the leaſt diſparitie betwixt man and wife. Though the man be as the head, yet is the woman as the heart, which is the moſt excellent part of the body next the head, farre more excellent then any other member vnder the head, and almoſt equall to the head in many reſpects, and as neceſſary as the head. As an euidence, that a wife is to man as the heart to the head, ſhe was at her firſt creation taken out of the ſide of man where his heart lieth; and though the woman was at firſt of the man created out of his ſide, yet is the man alſo by the woman. Euer ſince the firſt creation man hath beene borne and brought forth out of the womans wombe: ſo as neither the man is without the woman, nor the woman without the man: yea, as

the wife hath not power of her owne body, but the husband, ſo the husband hath not power of his owne body, but the wife. They are alſo heires together of the grace of life. Beſides, wiues are mothers of the ſame children, whereof their husbands are fathers (for God ſaid to both, multiplie and increaſe) and miſtreſſes of the ſame ſeruants whereof they are maſters (for Sarah is called miſtreſſe) and in many other reſpects there is a common equitie betwixt husbands and wiues; whence many wiues gather that in all things there ought to be a mutuall equalitie.

But from ſome particulars to inferre a generall is a very weake argument.

1. Doth it follow, that becauſe in many things there is a common equitie betwixt Iudges of Aſſiſe, Iuſtices of peace, and Conſtables of townes, that therefore there is in all things an equalitie betwixt them?

2. In many things there is not a common equitie: for the husband may command his wife, but not ſhe him.

3. Euen in thoſe things wherein there is a common equity,

there is not an equality: for the husband hath euer euen in all things a ſuperioritie: as if there be any difference euen in the forenamed inſtances, the husband muſt haue the ſtroake: as in giuing the name of Rachels youngeſt childe, where the wife would haue one name, the husband another, that name which the husband gaue, ſtood, (Gen. 35. 18.)

Though there ſeeme to be neuer ſo little diſparitie, yet God hauing ſo expreſly appointed ſubiection, it ought to be acknowledged: and though husband and wife may mutually ſerue one another through loue: yet the Apoſtle ſuffereth not a woman to rule ouer the man.

§. 5. Of a wiues acknowledgement of her

owne husbands ſuperioritie.

The truth and life of that generall acknowledgement of husbands honour, conſiſteth in the particular application therof vnto their owne proper husbands.

The next dutie therefore is, that wiues acknowledge their owne husbands, euen thoſe to whom by Gods prouidence they are ioyned in mariage, to be worthy of an husbands honour, and to be their ſuperiour: thus much the Apoſtle intendeth by that particle of reſtraint ( owne) which he vſeth very often: ſo likewiſe doth S. Peter, exhorting wiues to be in ſubiection to their owne husbands: and hereunto reſtraining the commendation of the ancient good wiues, that they were in ſubiection to their owne husbands.

Obiect. What if a man of meane place be maried to a woman of eminent place, or a ſeruant be maried to his miſtreſſe, or an aged woman to a youth, muſt ſuch a wife acknowledge ſuch an husband her ſuperiour?

Anſw. Yea verily: for in giuing her ſelfe to be his wife, and taking him to be her husband, ſhe aduanceth him aboue herſelfe, and ſubiecteth her ſelfe vnto him. It booteth nothing what either of them were before mariage: by vertue of the matrimoniall bond the husband is made the head of his wife, though the husband were before mariage a very begger, and of meane parentage, and the wife very wealthy and of a noble ſtocke; or though he were her prentiſe, or bondſlaue; which alſo holdeth in the caſe betwixt an aged woman and a youth:

for the Scripture hath made no exception in any of thoſe caſes.

2. Obiect. But what if a man of lewd and beaſtly conditions, as a drunkard, a glutton, a profane ſwaggerer, an impious ſwearer, and blaſphemer, be maried to a wife, ſober, religious Matron, muſt ſhe account him her ſuperiour, and worthy of an husbands honour?

Anſw. Surely ſhe muſt. For the euill qualitie and diſpoſition of his heart and life, doth not depriue a man of that ciuill honour which God hath giuen vnto him. Though an husband in regard of euill qualities may carrie the Image of the deuill, yet in regard of his place and office he beareth the [gap]mage of God: ſo doe Magiſtrates in the common-wealth, Miniſters in the Church, parents and maſters in the familie. Note for our preſent purpoſe, the exhortation of S. Peter to Chriſtian wiues which had infidell husbands, Be in ſubiection to them: let your conuerſation be in feare. If Infidels carrie [gap]ot the deuils Image, and are not, ſo long as they are Infidels, [gap]aſſals of Satan, who are? yet wiues muſt be ſubiect to them, and feare them.

§. 6. Of wiues denying honour to their owne husbands.

Contrary thereunto is a very peruerſe diſpoſition in ſome wiues, who thinke they could better ſubiect themſelues to any husband, then their owne. Though in generall they acknowledge that an husband is his wiues ſuperiour, yet when the application commeth to themſelues they faile, and cannot be brought to yeeld, that they are their husbands inferiours. This is a vice worſe then the former. For to acknowledge no husband to be ſuperiour ouer his wife, but to thinke man and wife in all things equall, may proceed from ignorance of hinde, and error of iudgement. But for a wife who knoweth and acknowledgeth the generall, that an husband is aboue his wife, to imagine that ſhe her ſelfe is not inferiour to her huſband, ariſeth from monſtrous ſelfe-conceit, and intolerable [gap]rrogancy, as if ſhe her ſelfe were aboue her owne ſex, and [gap]ore then a woman.

Contrary alſo is the practiſe of ſuch women, as purpoſely [gap]ary men of farre lower ranke then themſelues, for this very

end, that they may rule ouer their owne husbands: and of others who being aged, for that end mary youths, if not very boyes. A minde and practiſe very vnſeemely, and cleaneth warting Gods ordinance. But let them thinke of ruling what they liſt, the truth is, that they make themſelues ſubiects both by Gods law and mans: of which ſubiection ſuch wiues doe oft feele the heauieſt burden. Salomon noteth this to be one of the things for which the earth is diſquieted, when

a ſeruant reigneth. Now when can a ſeruant more dominere, then when he hath maried his miſtreſſe? As for aged women who are maried to youths, I may ſay (as in another caſe it was ſaid) woe to thee ô wife whoſe husband is a childe. Vnmeet it is that an aged man ſhould be maried to a young maid, but much more vnmeet for an aged woman to be maried to a youth.